So last night I had my fourth date with someone. Yes, you read that right – fourth. Better yet- I waited until the third date to sleep with him AND he texted me after and continued to try and make subsequent plans! Not ghosted after sex?? Refreshing! While you may be thinking, “Wow, isn’t this what you want”, the answer is I simply don’t know. There is nothing wrong with guy. In fact, he’s super smart, went to my alma mater, outgoing, cute, good in bed, tall, ambitious, activity-loving, and funny. AND he likes to dance. So yeah, he embodies every characteristic I look for in someone I date.
There is one caveat though. He doesn’t drink. He used to be a frat boy and definitely used to drink, but it is too early in seeing each other to get the deep-dish version for why he doesn’t drink anymore. For once, I am restraining myself form being too nosy. On our first date, he made it very clear that he had no qualms about me drinking, for he said he is used to being around his drunk friends all the time. In fact, he said that not having liquid courage has enabled him to be a better conversationalist.
I don’t know how I feel about being with a non-drinker. Not like ur girly wants an alcoholic, but after spending a few weeks talking/seeing this new guy, I am realizing how much of my life revolves around happy hours and binge-drinking. While he’s made it clear that he is perfectly happy to partake in those activities, I can’t help but feel a pang of guilt/awkwardness when I whip out a hard seltzer to eat with my tacos and I give him a LaCroix. On the bright side, him not drinking has certainly made me drink less, which is so evidently why I didn’t sleep with him until date four. As my “body count” post reveals, most of my hookups have been facilitated by alcohol, which is why it has been so different and assuring that I have basically been sober for all of my hangouts with new guy.
And that brings me to my next area of trepidation. I feel like I actually am getting to know him and that makes me scared. As I’ve stated before, my last relationship was in full-force right away, making me hesitant to jump into anything. YES I KNOW it has only been four dates, but new guy alludes to future plans (like yesterday he ask if I’d ever want to go to a museum ?), and I can’t help but get carried away with myself. It’s only natural. It is CLEARLY way too early for a “talk” of ANY sort, so I don’t know what he wants and I don’t know what I want. I guess because I have enjoyed all of his company so far, I should just play it day by day. I have NEVER been in a situation like this. It’s kinda fun. Like where is this going? Who am I kidding, I hate not being able to see in the future, but I guess being “present” and being along for the ride and not focusing on the destination may be good for me. Thoughts? I will give new-guy a pseudonym if we make it past date five. Until then, ‘new-guy’ is all he gets,